Muffs, Chuffs & Nonsense
If you want to laugh out loud, this is the book for you!
Fabulous reviews on Amazon
Valentine Lament
I hope that you notice my Valentine hint,
If you’re buying me chocolate, it has to be Lindt,
Some flowers from the florist; some bright fragrant blooms;
Not bought at the garage and wilting with fumes,
I want to eat out , with nice plates that all match,
Don’t drive to McDonalds and whizz past the hatch,
I want a nice bracelet, some earrings, a watch,
Not pairs of thin knickers that don’t have a crotch,
I want you to be a considerate lover,
Don’t fart, and then bury my head in the cover,
I want gentle words and a warm loving cuddle,
Don’t leave me in bed with this little damp puddle…
You can read the full verse in
Reviews of Muffs, Chuffs and Nonsense:
“This book of risqué verse is very funny. My other half started to read it aloud and we spent the evening giggling like a couple of teenagers. If you like to laugh buy this book!
“Funniest book ever! Very very naughty poetry, had to explain bits of it to my mum.
Laugh out Loud funny, just don’t read it near the kids – there is no way you can explain what you are laughing at to them”
“You will laugh until you truly ache from the first word to the last.
Not advisable to be read in prim or prudish company since one may have to explain the contents!
Fabulous contents, fabulous illustrations and fabulous debut book from Jan Jack.
Exceedingly funny and if you’re aware of Jan Jack’s poetry talents either through her Twitter feed or through her bespoke poems business, you won’t be disappointed. “

Comedian, Bespoke poet, Speaker & Celebrant





